28 Weeks

Our 28th week was a great one. We celebrated officially being in our 3rd trimester (a first for us), and we were able to celebrate Christmas with both sets of our parents with lots of love surrounding us and all our 4 of our children.

Normally Trae and I are busy traveling between my parents house in San Antonio and his parents house in Glen Rose over the holidays so we can see all our family, but this year we decided to play it safe and have all our family drive to us. Christmas Eve my parents drove in, we cooked dinner at the house and attended a beautiful Christams Eve service at St. Martins Lutheran Church.  Our church is part of our family- we have many close friends that attend, Pastor Pete, the senior pastor was a huge support system when the boys were born and subsequently passed away, and our own sons, Sawyer & Tristan are buried in the columnbarium in the chapel there. We love our church and plan to be lifelong members as we feel very close to our boys everytime we are there, so it was special to attend thier beautiful Christmas Eve service with our boys close.

Christmas Day we opened gifts at my brother and sister in laws house in Austin with my parents and relaxed before my parents drove home. Trae and I went to watch a movie together that evening and discussed how different next Christmas will be with 2 little girls with us.

A few days later, Trae's parents: Sharon & Milton and his sister, Carrie and her family came into town where we all went out to dinner, played card games where I reclaimed my winning title at "Left, Right, Center" for the 2nd year in a row and we all opened gifts.

Trae and I looked back fondly at last years Christmas where we were surprising our families with the news that Sawyer & Tristan were boys. We miss our sons terribly but felt their presence around us all week as we all talked and prayed about them daily. 

How Far Along? 28w6days

Stretch Marks?  Nope!

Sleep? This week sleep has been my only complaint, other than my inability to take off my boots anymore since I can't lean over. Baby A is now breech/transverse so she is feet down with her head in my right side. Its the most bizzare thing- my belly is literally wide because of the way she is laying. Baby B is balled up, also feet down/head up with her head right under my rib cage. When I lay flat on the bed A falls further right which is VERY uncomfortable and B travels further into my ribs which is also painful. Sleep has come with lots of tossing, turning, groaning and experimenting with lots of pillows.  We finally went and purchased a recliner we plan to use in the nursery when the girls are here but for me to sleep in for the next 8 weeks. Can't wait for it to get here!!

Best Moment of the Week? Spending Christmas with both sets of our parents & remembering our boys in different ways with all our family.

Movement? These girls move a lot at night, probably because their used to their mama moving around all day still. The kicks and jabs are getting harder every day and with 4 little legs/feet on my bladder I worry what's to come!

Food Cravings? Spicy food sounds good to me all the time. 

Genders? All Girls!

Symptoms: Sore legs & hips due to my belly growing and poor sleep are my only real complaints. 

Weekly Dr Appt: This week was started by seeing Dr Berry, our MFM where he gave us a 1929 Bronze Coin for achieving our first major goal of making it to 28 weeks! He gives awards for every milestone we reach: 28 weeks (Bronze), 32 weeks (Silver), 36 weeks (Gold).  We are going for the GOLD!!

It was at this appointment we learned that both babies were breech and very long. They were measuring over a week ahead in length and several days ahead in weight. Baby A weighed 2lbs 10 oz and Baby B weighed 2lbs 11 oz.  We were so pleased to hear both girls are growing so well and seem to very very content inside.  We don't see Dr Berry again until 32 weeks, but we will then see him weekly until the end of our pregnancy.

Our new recliner!

Blue Bear ornaments for our Sawyer & Tristan

New ornaments for our girls, located right next to their brothers ornaments

Trae parking my shopping cart I use at Home Depot- he can parallel park even a shopping cart well!

Baby Registry

Thank you to everyone who is sharing in our excitment on our pregnancy. We look back at 2013 in awe of all the blessings we were given & heartache our family has endured.

We look forward to keeping you all up to date on all the fun things we're doing to celebrate these 2 little girls joining our family including 2 baby showers coming up in January, and the evolving nursery that will incorporate all 4 of our children into it.

For those who are interested, we have 3 baby registeries:

www.myregistry.com

www.amazon.com

www.buybuybaby.com 


We hope you all have a lovely, relaxing holiday break. 

Happy Holidays,

The Schultzes

27 Weeks

SO LONG, 2ND TRIMESTER! 

We are so excited to be on our way to our 3rd trimester! Trae and I are starting to have more conversations that include the word "when". "When we bring the girls home", or "when the girls need a bath..." Normal conversation for most parents-to-be, but a momentus occasion for us.

With these "when" conversations we have also been looking at the calendar and realizing how much time we DON'T have left!!  We've been so worried this whole pregnancy that now that we are starting to realize we will be bringing babies home, after all.. we are running out of time left in our pregnancy! We are working hard at enjoying what's left of the pregnancy with these little girls- all their kicks & hiccups, sonograms, and learning what their personalities might be like based on their activity level in utero. I know these are fond memories to look back on and I don't take any of them for granted. Also, while pregnancy has been scary and uncomfortable and high risk for me, I can confidently say that I genuinely enjoy being pregnant. Even those nights when I'm not sleeping well due to uncomfort or when I go into my closet and some of my maternity clothes are starting to get tight, I look in the mirror and feel proud of myself, proud of my body and beautiful.  It's all a miracle and while I'm so looking forward to the moments Trae and I are allowing ourselves to dream about now with our little girls.. I CAN wait until the latest possible moment, knowing every additional hour these girls are in utero is better for Mom and Babies.

How Far Along? 27 Weeks 6 days
Stretch Marks? Nope- Dr thinks I might be able to avoid completely!
Sleep? Off and on, babies are moving a LOT at night, but experimenting with pillows is working so far
Best Moment of the Week? Trae and I had our maternity photos taken by an old, talented friend, Jenni Jones this week. It was a special & full circle moment for us as we were very much looking forward to shooting with Jenni when pregnant with the boys, and were only a couple weeks away from our opportunity to when we lost the boys.  Being able to have our photos taken by Jenni signified a significant milestone for us and we both felt very calm and happy while there in the moment. I told Trae I could feel all my babies with me.. the girls kicking & moving in my stomach and my sons warmth around me as Trae and Jenni were with me, remembering all our children.  Jenni shared 2 two photos as a preview and we were completely taken away with the beauty of the image. She is a true talent. www.jennijonesphotography.com
Movement: I'm so glad to say that I get to feel these 8 limbs moving all day long! If I ever feel like its been too long, I chug a bunch of cold water or iced tea and there they go!! It's a fun feeling.
Food Cravings? Iced Tea, cinnamon raisen bagels, iced coffee.
Genders? All Girl x 2
Symptoms: Round Ligament pain is worst the day after an active day or in the morning, Other than that I'm just finding myself to be really tired throughout the day and going to sleep by 10 most nights.
Weekly Dr Appt:
Our 27 week appointment was a quick one. Dr Reue showed how long my cervix was on sonogram and he felt confident that my pregnancy would continue for several more weeks. While looking at my cervix he showed me how high my TAC stich was and we all agreed we did the right thing for our clinical need.  Oh, and Baby A decided to show us her girl parts front and center on the screen- we all got a good laugh!
I got all my 3rd trimester shots & bloodwork done and it was confirmed that I'm not anemic & that I did pass my glucose test- Woo HOO!!

Next week we go to the MFM and see our little girls on 4D sonogram, in addition to celebrating Christmas with both our families! Feeling very blessed this Christmas season.

Cheering on Texas Longhorn Basketball

Me at my 27 wk appointment impatiently waiting to see the girls!!

26 Weeks

Trae and I celebrated our 26th week with a planned mini stay-cation home from work on Monday & Tuesday so that we could proactively work on some to do's to get ready for babies and spend some time together.

We bought a few things for the nursery, wrapped some Christmas presents for our family and bought me a bigger & better car to tote the girls around in! YAY! We bought a 2014 GMC Acadia with bucket seats & plenty of storage room for all that twin gear we'll be gladly toting around. I love my new mom-ride and look forward to filling it with my new family in less than 3 months.

How Far Along? 26w6d

Stretch Marks? Nope! Whew!

Sleep? Some nights are good while others are spent tossing & turning. This will be an ongoing issue, I think.

Best Moment of the Week: Spending time with my husband making plans for our daughters' nursery

Movement: All the time! Especially after drinking cold water or eating oranges.

Food Cravings: Iced Tea & lots of water!

Genders: Both Girls!

Symptoms: This week I have been super tired all the time and HOT!! It's cold outside so we've needed the heat on and I'm freezing Trae out when I don't let the heat turn on and it's 67 degrees in the house. So comfortable for me but Trae is bundled up most of the time.

Weekly Dr Appointment

Our 26 week appointment included a glucose test for me to test for gestational diabetes. The drink itself didn't taste horrible but it made me SO sick!! Thankfully, I passed the test so I don't have to drink it again! YUCK!

Dr Reue said the girls heartbeats were good & my cervix still looked long & closed- so no reason to worry or do additional testing! We don't see our MFM Dr Berry until 28 weeks, so we asked to be checked my Dr Reue again next week.

 Sunday Trae and I have maternity photos with an old friend & very talented photographer. We are so excited to experience these photos & can't wait to share some of the special images!!

George loves to give the girls hugs!

Mine & The girls' new ride!!

25 Weeks

How Far Along? 25 Weeks

Maternity Clothes? Mostly all I wear is maternity or lose fitting spandex-filled clothing. The girls need room to move & so do I!

Stretch Marks? None yet.. hoping it stays that way!

Sleep: Not good. My hips & back hurt so badly that I spend 1/2 the night in bed with lots of pillows and 1/2 the night on our couch. Doctors advise me to use Tylenol & Benadryl every night to help me sleep a few more hours more comfortably. 

Best Moment This Week: Holding Trae's hand while walking out of L&D STILL pregnant.

Movement: All the time- constantly! Baby A is head down on my right side so I feel her kicks lower while Baby B is transverse, her head by my belly button so I feel & see her movements often as they are right on top of my lungs!

Food Cravings: Fruit & anything sweet- I even pulled the pregnancy card & stopped for Dunkin Donuts the other day! 

Genders: Both girls. :)

Symptoms: I have round ligament pain throughout the day when walking and I'm hot ALL the time (hence the chalkboard sign of the girls loving the cooler weather.) Every time I hear a cold front is coming in I crack the windows and Trae puts on another layer of clothing.

However, earlier this week I was feeling nauseous, with a painful back & sore/tight belly.. all signs pointed towards contractions. I took a Benadryl to calm Braxton Hicks, which I have been getting of and on and scheduled an appointment with my doctor. When I went to the doctor, I was hooked up to a machine which proved I was still having contractions every 2-3 minutes. I was admitted to L&D where I had another Fetal Fibronectin test done & given fluids for 5 hours while the girls and I were monitored. The fluids slowed the contractions down and my FFN test came back negative, which proved I wasn't in premature labor. MUSIC to our ears! We were discharged after 6 hours in L&D with a prescription for Procardia that I will take twice a day for the remainder of my pregnancy to calm my now medicially described "irritable uterus".  Hopefully the Procardia will keep things nice and calm for the remainder of our pregnancy with these girls.

Belly Button in or Out: 1/2 way out

In other news... Trae and I are starting to discuss names more often. We have one of the girls' names all settled on and are going back and forth about the other one. Hopefully we will have it settled by the time they come! 

December is here, Christmas decor is up and my first baby shower invitation is hung up. We are so grateful to be pregnant with our girls- it's the best gift God could have given after he gave us our sons. We are so excited for everything this pregnancy has left including maternity photos and celebrating with friends & family at our baby showers.

Week 24

This week we are celebrating successfully making it to 24 weeks in our pregnancy with these twin girls!

24 weeks has always been a big goal for us as it marks the first date that doctors consider babies viable enough to live outside the womb with medical intervention.  While 'Viability' is a word that rings so sweetly to our ears, we have hopes & plans to carry this pregnancy much, much further giving these girls the best chance at growing big & healthy with little/no need for NICU time.

Now that we are the MOST pregnant we have ever been... we look forward to sailing these unchartered waters side by side with our amazing Dr's to guide us.

Our 24 week appointment showed our little girls to be growing very well:
Baby A measured 25w0d (a full week ahead!) at 1 LB 12 oz. and 93rd percentile
Baby B measured 24w5d at 1 LB 10 oz and 86th Percentile

Both girls are BIG movers! I can feel them kicking & hiccuping all day, even throughout the night. Trae and I like to think they're going to be little dancers and they're practicing their moves now.

With all this great growth I have experienced some increasing discomfort in my abdomen & lower back.  Any short walk or errand usually results in braxton hicks and a rough nights sleep, so I've cut back on all unneccesary activity.  Due to these concerns, we did have Dr Berry check my cervix and do a Fetal Fibronectin test at our 24 week appointment to make sure all these pains were just growing pains and not the sign of pre term labor.  The test came back "Negative" meaning my body isn't going into any distress or preterm labor in the next two weeks!!  What a relief!  I keep telling Trae I can deal with any pain/discomfort that comes with pregnancy, as long as it means the girls are safe & healthy.

This week is Thanksgiving week. We have family in town staying with us, doing all our cooking & helping how they can around the house so I can continue resting.  We are enjoying the cooler weather & a few days off work to rest and relax.

We are abundantly Thankful for all God has blessed us with & continues to bless us with.

Happy Thanksgiving!

The Power of 23

23 has been a powerful number to us since we lost Sawyer & Tristan at 23 weeks gestation.

23 weeks 0 days marked the beginning of the end of our innocence in many ways.. it was the last day of my pregnancy, the first of 6 days with my sweet Sawyer & Tristan and the end of my joyous pregnancy.  It was the end of our carefree joy and the beginning of our painful "new normal."

Today, Trae and I are taking a leap of faith and trying to change the power of 23 in our lives.  Today is a good day filled with bittersweet tears, but hopeful tomorrow's.  Today Trae and I find ourselves pregnant again: 23 weeks 0 days pregnant with our 3rd and 4th children.  Yes, God has blessed us with twins, again.. this time, daughters due to make their arrival in late February.

This pregnancy has been significantly different than my pregnancy with the boys. Physically, I feel better overall- not as uncomfortable with the back & hip pain that I was experiencing with the boys, but I think largely this is due to my physically conservative pregnancy with the girls.  Although my permanent cerclage is in place and will not allow my cervix to shorten, Trae and I have taken extra precautions to alleviate any unneccesary pressure from my body during this time, so all it has to do is grow healthy baby girls.  I still work full time at March of Dimes, but watch my hours on my feet and make sure I'm comfortable throughout the day.  Trae has taken over most household duties, even vacuuming when I've asked, and now takes the dogs on all the walks by himself.. something I miss doing with them, but will look forward to resuming with the girls in a few months.

We now have 2 doctors watching our progress.. my new OB, Dr Reue and our Maternal Fetal Medicine Specialist (High Risk Doctor) Dr. Berry.  In the first trimester, we were seeing our OB every 2-3 weeks and our MFM every 3-4. Since 20 weeks, we see our OB every week and my MFM every 3 weeks.  We get to see the girls and their growth progress every 3 weeks at Dr Berry's office and Dr Reue checks my symptoms, cervix and blood every week.  Trae attends every appointment with me and we feel very blessed to have two doctors so committed to the health of our pregnancy and baby girls.

Despite all the positive signs pointing to a successful physical pregnancy, this has been an extremely challenging time for us & our family both mentally and emotionally.  We all feel blessed for the opportunity to be parents again.. and to twins again!! But knowing the conclusion of the "what if's" is a scary thing.  Also, knowing that while Trae, myself and our Doctors will continue to do everything we can to be proactive .. that we are not really in control, is a scary thing.

While we do not believe that we are given a specific "plan" by God that we are living daily.. we do believe in God's larger plan- which is to live a life guided by our Lord and to ultimately spend eternity with him after our life on earth is complete.  This is the plan that gives us hope, knowing that our life on earth will be spent trying to expand our family, in God's loving guidance... and knowing that when this life is complete- all the joys and pains that have come with it.. we will be with all our family & children.

Today is a good day, a blessed day.  Today is the end of the negativity that comes with 23 weeks 0 days and the beginning of our healthy pregnancy with Sawyer & Tristan's sisters.  (names to be kept a secret until they are born)

We thank you for all your prayers for our family- we promise to keep you updated on our progress!

Love, Cyndi & Trae

When love turns into a career path...

After volunteering for March of Dimes since we lost the boys in February and becoming close friends with several of the Directors in the Austin office, I was offered a full time fundraising position in July and gladly accepted it.
While working in non-profit was never on my radar before, the job that was offered gave me opportunity to fundraise the March of Dimes mission within my community and be responsible for planning & facilitating one of our top fundraising events of the year: the annual Signature Chefs Auction Gala.  It also gave me the priceless opportunity to walk into an office every day where my peers and those I talk to in the community know me first as Sawyer & Tristan's Mommy.. and second as a March of Dimes employee. I knew there was no where else in the world that I would get that opportunity.

With the Gala in October, I barely had time to walk into my office before work started piling up, but I made sure to hang a few things on my walls that first week: our Team Sawyer & Tristan banner we walk with in the March of Dimes walk, pictures of their tiny footprints at my desk and the white butterflies our Moms carried in honor of the boys at the walk.  Now walking into my office, I see my sons everywhere around me and remember every second why I'm doing what I'm doing with my life.

Ask any brave "Mission Mom" at March of Dimes: talking about your children and the struggle you endured, or continue to endure is not easy. You do it because you hope the process of telling your story is cathardic for both you and others. You hope the words that you're saying strike a chord with someone who is silently coping, or knows someone who is.. so that they know there are others out there that know their pain. More than anything, you hope your personal story helps someone.. and maybe by telling it through the March of Dimes it can help another Mommy & Daddy not have to go through what you went through with the research so many scientists are doing with grant money raised through March of Dimes.  Most importantly you do it... it's a sacrifice that you do for your children.. a way to continue to parent that baby you miss so dearly.

Although many of my days are filled with conversations with lumps in my throat & tears in my eyes, I can tell you that I've never felt more fulfilled by the hard work that I do and I've never felt more of a drive to succeed than I currently feel.

Our Gala was last Thursday:  I worked so hard on this event and was so proud to see it come together. Our office goal was to raise $280,000 at the event, my personal goal (which was gawked at by some coworkers) was $350,000.

We raised over $450,000.

Trae and I walked out of the Gala, me carrying my heels in my hand and Trae holding my hand. We looked at each other the same way as we had so many times before this year: with tears in our eyes, love in our remaining hearts and smiles on our faces before we simply said "I love you."

I consider myself so lucky to have found a home with March of Dimes. My office is filled with lovely souls all coming into work daily with the intent to save lives through their talents.
We hug each other through the good times and the sad and everything in between. I know Sawyer & Tristan would be so unbelievably proud of their parents for finding this new family that loves us and them so much.

Our Trip to Chicago

Throughout the grieving process in losing our sons, Tristan & Sawyer, Trae and I have (thankfully) always been in sync in our thought processes.  In our devastation, we both felt strongly that we needed to honor our sweet babies for the rest of our lives, which we have done through our work with March of Dimes.  We also knew we needed to regain some control over my health that would make carrying a baby possible in the future.

The doctors immediately diagnosed my losing Sawyer & Tristan at 23 weeks due to an "Incompetent Cervix." Essentially, my cervix was too weak to sustain the weight of my babies. Contrary to our & others beliefs that this was due to me being in an airplane 2 weeks before, or hiking or being on a bike... all our doctors assured us that nothing we did caused my incompetent cervix to happen, or happen when it did- it was all going to happen anyway due to the way my body was built.  Dr's went on to explain that this would have (likely) happened if I was pregnant with a singleton baby, as well- I just would have likely gone into labor closer to 28-30 weeks with 1 baby.

While I was navigating my new "normal" at home, I immediately started researching what we could do to fix my cervix.  I knew we were going to have to wait to start a family again, for several reasons- but I had to do SOMETHING to be proactive and to fix my body that failed my family.  We met with my new OB to discuss our concerns and he sent us to Dr Berry, a perinatologist, (MFM) in town.  Our appointment with Dr Berry was a long one where he discussed our options which all included having a cerclage for any future pregnancy and being on strict watch once pregnant.  I trusted Dr Berry and know his work is trusted well around Austin, but continued to do research and found a surgeon in Chicago that specialized in a permanent cerclage that can be placed prior to pregnancy.  Trae and I had a phone consultation with Dr Arthur Haney where we learned he had been the Chief of Medicine at University of Chicago for over 10 years and specialized in this surgery for over 8 years. He also helped train our Reproductive Endocrinologist here in Austin, which made us feel right at home.  Dr Haney answered all our questions and agreed we were perfect candidates for the surgery. I scheduled my surgery & trip to Chicago the next week.

With my brother, Paul's help with his travel points, and Trae's loving support & willingness to help nurse me back to health, we flew to Chicago in mid April to have my Trans Abdominal Cerclage placed.  The surgery went well- Dr Haney was able to secure 2 mersilene bands around the very top of my cerix, ensuring my cervix would never again be able to dilate in labor. The cerclage allow me to get pregnant naturally (if blessed that way), allow us to go through fertility treatments ( if needed again) and have normal fluids pass in and out, it just doesn't allow my cervix to contract at all past its normal width.  The cerclage does, however, require me to have a C-section with any subsequent pregnancies- a small price to pay for a healthy baby!  

After a night in the hospital and a very sore following night in our hotel we returned home where I started feeling back to normal in about a week.  I'm left with a 3" scar which will later be the same location as a C-Section, if we're blessed with more children.  Our trip to Chicago was a short one, and an emotional one.. but we left with a sense of accomplishment knowing we would never again lose a baby due to this problem.  While we wish we could have fixed it to save Sawyer & Tristan we feel certain that they would feel proud of their Mom and Dad for finding the faith and strength to do the surgery for any future siblings of theirs.

We lucked out with a corner hospital room w/ a nice view of Chicago's city skyline

The other side to our hospital room where Trae relaxed while I slept

Swollen + Addl Gas from Surgery = Uncomfortable & Pregnant looking

Strict no walking rules meant Trae got to carry bags & push the patient

Posing in the hotel the night before surgery, feeling proud & hopeful

Dinner date the night before surgery with my favorite person/nurse/papa

Team Sawyer & Tristan

In an average week in Texas...

• 7,723 babies are born.
• 1,001 babies are born preterm
• 335 babies are born with a birth defect
• 48 babies die before their first birthday

* March of Dimes

After Sawyer & Tristan passed away, Trae and I were left with holes in our hearts and a lost feeling on what direction to turn to for proper support for child loss.  It was important to us to start our healing process together while honoring our boys and remembering them, always.  We knew of the March of Dimes organization from friends' fundraising efforts and from the boys' NICU nurses and decided to start a Family Team with the March of Dimes.  We received such generous donations from family and friends to the March of Dimes and Threads of Love after the boys passing and memorial service, that the local offices knew our family by name when they were contacted by us. 

 Our local Austin March of Dimes chapter welcomed us to the organization with open arms and quickly put me in contact with a local Family Team captain, named Melissa, who has a similar story of baby loss as ours.  Melissa took my by the hand, helping me navigate through my first few weeks as a Mom of angels and helped me start our Family Team.  We named our Family Team: "Team Sawyer & Tristan" and set forth an initial fundraising goal of $2113.00, for the boys birthdate.  Within 24 hours our goal had been surpassed and we were continuing to raise money!  We knew our boys were loved by so many, but it became clear to us that our friends were helping us spread their name and story with every dollar donated, so we raised our personal goal to be the highest Family Team fundraiser in the city, a title my new friend Melissa has held for the past 2 years in a row.  Melissa encouraged us to reach this goal, continuing to help where she could along the way.

With our team page set up and fundraising efforts under way, we set our sights on planning the March for Babies 5k walk in May.  With the help of our good friends, Heidi & Jonathan Parker, we came up with a team logo to design T-shirts to sell for the walk (proceeds going to March of Dimes) and Jonathan's company made a banner for us to walk with.  

The event day we were blessed with a cool Texas morning and the sun shining on all us walking for our babies.  We had family and friends, from all over the state come to walk with us.  We had friends texting us pictures of them wearing our shirts with pride the day of the walk, despite them not being able to come in person.  We also had a large outpouring of support from our new OB's office staff, both coming to walk and purchasing our shirts & wristbands.  We felt so blessed to have so many people come out to remember our son's during the month they were due to be born, originally.   

Working with the March of Dimes has given us the opportunity to raise awareness of Cervical Insufficiency, Prematuraty and the story of Sawyer, Tristan, Trae and myself.  We hope to be able to help other babies and pregnant women through the funds we've raised in memory of Sawyer & Tristan through research the March of Dimes continues to do.  We will plan to continue our fundraising efforts with March of Dimes through Team Sawyer & Tristan in the years to come and invite anyone who wants to come celebrate their lives to walk with us!  The walk is a fun, celebratory event with tons of kids activities, laughs and music.**Next year the walk will be in Round Rock on May 8th as Zilker Park will be under construction during that time.**

 All in all, we feel lucky to have found such a worthy organization that allows Trae and I to feel like parents every day- a priceless gift.